Orgasms

Orgasms

I see a lot of things on Lois’ tumblr about female orgasm denial. Some of it is valid and some of it is complete nonsense so I wanted to attempt to explain why I initiated my subs current orgasm regime. Some of this Lois is aware of but other parts may be news to her too.

As I’ve mentioned before, and this is definitely not news to her, Lois had completely unlearned anything that she had previously learn about being a submissive. It was in her, I knew that the first time we met but she was undisciplined and far too focussed on her own pleasure than anyone who calls themselves a submissive should be.

It wasn’t entirely her fault I don’t suppose, she had been single for a long time and I think it is hard for a person to maintain what I would call “proper discipline” whilst single and playing with various different people who often are merely playing at being a Dominant themselves.

Let me just stop her to clarify something, being a submissive has nothing to do with being a masochist. Yes often the two often go hand in hand but this is definitely not always the case. Lois happens to be both but the two should not be confused or interchanged, being a masochist means that you enjoy pain, you get pleasure from it in the moment. I myself have enjoyed receiving pain on occasion but I am not even slightly submissive (and yes I have tried and proved this point). Being a submissive is, in my opinion, a deeper calling somewhat akin to a vocation. She IS a submissive and gets deep fulfillment (not pleasure but fulfillment) from submitting to another person and giving that other person what they want.

Whilst I understood the reasons for Lois’ seeming lack of training when we met I wasn’t about to just live with it and so I instigated various rules for her to follow, some had good reasons and others were just to keep her int he mindset that she is not just free to do whatever she wanted anymore. The majority of her free time, her mind and her body now belonged to me which included one particular aspect, orgasms.

Lois has quite a high sex drive and up until we met she was masturbating twice a day, literally twice every single day. Once when she woke up before she got out of bed and once just before she went to sleep. And that doesn’t even count any ad-hoc little adventures she had whilst watching porn or doing whatever with random people. That is a lot in my opinion, especially for a sub and I wasn’t about to let it continue.

I know she has talked about this on here before but I will reiterate what the “regime” that I am referring to entails, the easiest way being to quote our agreement:

([The submissive] is Lois and [the dominant] myself, obviously)

[The submissive] is not entitled to orgasmic release without the express permission of [the dominant] or a third party to whom [the dominant] has granted authority to give permission. [The submissive], with the guidance of [the dominant], will take steps to gain control of her orgasmic release and accidental release will incure a severe punishment of [the dominants] choosing.

[The submissive] will submit to a daily orgasm without release (aka ruined orgasm) to be facilitated by [the dominant].

[The submissive] is entitled to one orgasmic release per seven day period at a time and place of [the dominants] choosing.

[The dominant] has the authority to grant or order orgasmic release at their discretion.

In summary, I tell her when and where she can cum and if she does it without permission I will make sure she regrets it enough to learn to obey her rules.

To understand why I put together the regime of daily ruins with one weekly release you need to understand how men and women differ and why simple chastity is less effective in women than it is in men. The following is what I understand of it and is not necessarily 100% scientifically accurate but it fits with what I have seen in my many years as a Domme to people of various sexual identities.

When you prevent a man from having an orgasm for a long period of time it tends to make him more horny, he begins to see sexual opportunity wherever he goes and often attempts to act on those “opportunities” or, if unable to due to a chastity device for instance, becomes very frustrated which is obviously fun thing to inflict on a sub.

With women, if they don’t orgasm for a long time their sex drive tends to wain and they just become less and less interested in sex which is why a vibrator is a single girl’s best friend. So unless you want to turn your sexy sub girl into a dull housewife then long term chastity is not really the way to go in my opinion.

The way a ruined orgasm works is that you stimulate the persons cock or pussy until their orgasm begins and then cease all stimulation immediately. This is easier to achieve in men because there are more physical signs that it’s time to move your hand, with women I think you need to either be doing it to yourself or know the person pretty well to know when to stop.

I’ve seen a man’s cock jerking around in mid air and not even able to ejaculate from a ruined orgasm which I’m assured is very frustrating and I’ve experienced my own “ruin” and felt the disappointment as my pussy clenched around nothing, going through the physical motions of an orgasm without the wave of pleasure that usually accompanies it, again, frustrating, I won’t be doing that again!

As I mentioned Lois’ sex drive was already very high but I wanted it higher and I wanted it mostly unfulfilled and the daily ruined orgasms are the perfect tool for the job. The build up gets her super turned on and literally dripping wet to the point she now kneels on a tiled floor in the bathroom for it so that the carpet doesn’t get ruined along with her orgasm. In the early days she used to moan and make angry noises when I stopped but these days she takes it with dignity often taking the frustration by digging her nails into her hands or biting her lip.

When it’s done she is simply more horny than she was before and more sexually frustrated and so it goes on until the weekend when I have a sexually supercharged sub on my hands to play with. There is no downside for me.

Lois has described it as like eating your favourite meal every day but never being full which I think is a nice analogy. and a good way for her to feel. We wouldn’t want a sexually satisfied submissive would we?

I hope you find this interesting and hope you discuss it in the comments, I will happily join in if you want to provide your own perspective whether in agreement or disagreement with my own. I know Lois is struggling to find time to write at the moment so hopefully this will be a sufficient filler until she can get back to it.

Achievements

Achievements

So it is 2pm on Thursday 10th May 2018 and I have been a very busy girl today and wanted to share everything I have achieved so far today!

I got up at 6am when my fitness band vibrated on my wrist, no snoozing, no second alarm just straight out of bed. I bought a fitness band not to track my steps and things but simply so that I could have a silent alarm that would make me but not Mistress as I have things to do before she wakes up.

I used the toilet and then got in the shower and cleaned myself thoroughly which includes ensuring that no body hair exists anywhere and that both of my holes are washed out with water .Occasionally Mistress will push a finger deep into me and if it comes out dirty then cleaning her finger with my mouth is the least of my worries! That hasn’t happened for a long time though.

After my shower but before dressing I went to the kitchen and prepared some food. Mistresses office location means she has few options for lunch so likes to take something with her, this morning I made a couscous and pomegranate salad whilst some croissant baked in the oven and then I took a croissant and coffee up to her.

Mistress enjoys watching me get ready for work whilst she eats her breakfast. At first it made me feel very self-conscious as she watched me dry my hair and apply my makeup and then get dressed, bending over and hiding nothing. Now though it is almost like a show, I make sure I bend over at just the right angles so that my fiancé can enjoy the best views of every part of my body.

Anyway, once I was dressed she called me over to the bed and opened her legs. There were no orders given, and despite the fact that I had just done my makeup etc, my lips were on hers almost immediately and I was savouring the taste of her as my tongue circled her clit.

She came with her hand on the back of my head so that she could grind her pussy into my face and casually lifted her leg over me and headed for the shower leaving me knelt on the bed.

I brushed my messed up hair again whilst her juices dried around my mouth because I’m not permitted to wipe it off, ever, then I applied my makeup again and changed my underwear which was already soaked through. That seems like a simple thing when you’re wearing a skirt but it really isn’t because I have to wear a matching lingerie set at all times so changing my knickers means also changing my bra and garter belt. I almost didn’t bother but I do like to start the day with at least mostly dry knickers!

When Miss came out of the shower I could see I was in trouble for something, she had that look on her face and it didn’t take me long to remember that I hadn’t picked my wet towel up off the floor in the bathroom. She sat on the edge of the bed and I walked over to her, knelt and then belt over her knee in as graceful a way as possible. She said “Do you know why?” and I responded “Yes Mistress, the towel, I’m sorry” and she replied with “Ten then”.

She lifted my skirt to reveal my ass cheeks (almost all of my underwear is thongs so that my ass cheeks are almost always bare) and I counted out each severe slap of her hand. Punishment spankings are very different from play spankings, there is no warm up, no gentle swats to get me ready or roaming fingers to explore how I’m reacting to the attention, it’s ten hard and fast and then a quick hug before she let me get up so she could get ready.

After doing my hair for the third time I left the house at 7:30 and sat uncomfortably in the car on my freshly reddened ass until I arrived at work.

At 12pm, having done just over four hours of work I left the office for my lunch hour, I rarely take the full hour but I needed to today. I got into a waiting taxi that I had already ordered as per the text I had received at 11am from Mistress, I reviewed some paperwork on the ten minute taxi ride. At my destination I asked the taxi to wait for me and then went down behind some buildings and knocked on the back door of a familiar one.

I was let in by the usual person and led in silence to a small messy office in the corner of the store-room where I pulled my skirt up around my waist and knelt on the floor. The guy has quite good stamina and despite my now well practised skills in fellatio it usually takes about eight minutes before I’m swallowing his cum, this time with his hand buried in my hair.

This “service” that Mistress has me provide has turned sucking cock and swallowing cum into a sort of non-thing for me. The act itself does turn me on but only really because of how humiliating it is to be used in that way by strangers, actually sucking the cock and swallowing is almost like muscle memory now, I can think about other things while I do it and my mouth just does what it is supposed to.

After sorting my hair again and reapplying lipstick I got back into the waiting taxi and had it drop me in town. I got a sandwich and a coke to join my “snack” and took it back to the office to eat with some of my colleagues.

I wonder what the rest of the day has in store for me!

Engagement

Engagement2

I just wanted to write a short post to say how happy I am that Lois accepted my proposal of marriage.

Our relationship started out on rocky ground as has been well documented here on her blog but has grown into something much more than I think either of us ever intended or expected. Each of us has grown because of the other and I don’t think either of us can now imagine being without the other.

Yes, she is submissive and I am her Domme, she belongs to me and obeys me and all of that, but she is also my partner and my soul mate and I love her dearly and cannot wait to spend the rest of my life with her.

So thank you Lois, for making me the happiest Domme alive and for just being you.

So that happened!

Engagement

I was really excited last night because Mistress was taking me out for a fancy meal and then we were meeting my sister and friends for some drinks. I knew Mistress had got me a present but it turned out to be something I was definitely NOT expecting!

After we’d eaten the main course, me with my dress arranged so that my naked ass was on the seat as per Mistresses instructions, she stood up looking nervous. I was very confused and my heart started racing because I had no idea what was happening, then she came around the table and knelt in front of me and produced a ring.

I was crying immediately put my hands over my mouth as she said (I’m going to paraphrase a little here as I can’t remember the exact words:

“Lois, you’ve turned my life upside down and I love you for it. You are a beautiful and amazing person and I want to spend my life with you, will you marry me…please.”

I just blurted out “YES!” and wrapped my arms around her and we hugged for what felt like ages until I realised that EVERYONE was staring at us and then they all started to clap and I was so embarrassed and turned bright red. Tears were running down my cheeks as she slid the ring onto my finger and then handed me another identical ring and held out her own finger.

As we sat and waited for our dessert various people at the tables around us congratulated us and it felt like we were the subject of everyone’s conversations, Miss said “Maybe I should have waited until after desert!” and I laughed, probably too loudly!

We held hands basically the whole rest of the meal and I felt like my chest was going to explode with happiness! I know that sounds cheesy but that’s how I felt, and still feel now! Mistress told me that she’d chosen identical rings for us to show that we are completely equal in this……MARRIAGE(!) even if I belong to her.

We left the restaurant and headed to the bar to meet everyone and they all cheered when we walked in and my mum was there too!! Mistress had asked my mum if she could marry me, how adorable is that?! My mum, sister and Miss Hannah all knew she was going to propose to me, only Emma (Miss Hannah’s sub) was surprised at what the big event was.

So now we have to plan a wedding!! How crazy is that?

Happy Birthday

HappyBirthday2018

…to me!

I’m officially a year older today although fortunately I still look quite young for my age, or so I’m told! What once was a source or much annoyance has become something to be happy about although it still bugs me when people tell me how young I look for some reason.

Mistress is taking me out to a fancy restaurant tonight and I can’t wait, I’m sure she will have some surprises or “fun” for me whilst we are out and I just love being a secret little slut in fancy places! Miss Hannah, her sub and my sister are joining us afterwards for a few drinks so it should be a good night.

CuffsWhat did Mistress get me for my birthday I hear you ask? Well, I don’t know yet as she is giving me my main present tonight but this morning she did give me a pair of cross over hand cuffs which I’ve wanted for ages and absolutely love the look of.

They are practical too though, I genuinely can’t wriggle out of them or really move my wrists much when they are on which, obviously, is a delicious feeling when Mistress is there holding the keys and I need to go to work!

Enough about my birthday though, last Saturday Mistress attended a dinner party with five other Dominants at which myself and the other submissives served them.

Two cooked and the other four of us were servers and attended to the Dominants every need from bringing the food to keeping their glasses topped up to…..other services! I arrived at the venue (one of the Dominants houses) and met the other submissives. I’m not going to name them all but I’ve mentioned Sophie before and Emma is Miss Hannah’s sub. I got on very well with all of the girls and before I knew it I was half naked in front of them as we tried on our “uniform” for the night.

I don’t know who came up with it but it was HIGHLY predictable and clichĂ©! Thigh high stockings with suspender belt over a little thong, black heels and a shelf bra (i.e. cupless) all in black. I do have to admit we all looked pretty good dressed up like that, it was pretty hot. To add to the effect we all put our hair up in a high pony tail (we all had longish hair) and one of the girls who works at a Dior counter did all of our makeup the same, bright red lipstick and a black smokey eye.

We all did the food preparation under the guidance of the two who would be cooking (they had aprons to protect their sensitive parts!) and then the four of us who would be serving set the table after researching how to set a table “properly” and then practised serving plates to guests at the same time like they do in fancy restaurants so that everyone gets their food at the exact same moment, we got pretty good at it too!

It was good fun working with the other subs to get it all ready, each of us wanted to make our Dominant proud of us and so we all put in a lot of effort to make the dinner really special.

As the guests arrived Sophie took their coats and I was stood right beside her holding a tray with flutes of champagne and one of the other girls was beside me with a similar tray of cold beers in tall glasses. When Mistress arrived she handed off her coat and then ran her hand over my cheek as she took a flute from my tray, the touch and the smile she gave me sent shivers right through my body and then she went over to sit with the other Dominants who were all chatting.

We had a plan to ensure no one was without a drink, we always had fresh drinks on hand and as we saw someone finishing theirs one of us would take the empty glass and the other would refill their hand with a fresh one. They all commented on how attentive “the girls” were and it made us all smile. Honestly in “the back” we were like a bunch of school girls all gleefully pleased with how well we were doing!

I need to go and get ready now so I will finish this tomorrow…..

Busy week

BusyWeek

Not a great deal to share this week unfortunately. I started a new project at work and have been doing upwards of twelve hours a day in the office so not much time for anything more interesting I’m afraid.

Despite my long work hours Mistress is still maintaining my daily ruined orgasm, you’d think that after months it would become easier and less frustrating but nope, I’m basically always in a states of sexual frustration although I have managed to get my head around that enough that my mind doesn’t wander into a sexual fantasy every time I don’t have something to focus on, not every time.

I have to admit that I struggled with it a bit this week, after working a long day having to strip and kneel for Miss to finger my clit to orgasm only to stop at just the right moment so that my body goes through the motions, my pussy throbbing and thrusting against thin air whilst I get none of the release is incredibly frustrating and caused a few tears this week.

Mistress was really good about it, holding me and comforting me afterwards and even made my food for me but still no release for my constantly wet and needy hole.

Tonight we are attending a dinner party, well I say “we” but in actual fact the dinner party is just for the Dominants. My Mistress, Miss Hannah and four others will be in attendance and myself and the other five subs will be serving them, two cooking (not me thankfully) and the other four as waitresses.

Uniforms have been arranged for all of us, I can only imagine what they will be, something suitably skimpy I would imagine to give the Dominants some entertainment whilst they chat and eat. They are hoping to make the dinner party a regular arrangement so that should be fun. I’m looking forward to meeting the other subs (the ones I don’t already know) and having a good evening. I’ve been promised a real orgasm too so that’s something to look forward to!

Anyway, just a short post to let you know I’m still alive, I will write about tonight as soon as I get time next week x

Sometimes

Sometimes

Sometimes Mistress arrives home and she is just plain horny. There are no complicated rules or protocols to it, it is just raw animistic lust. It’s rough, its sexy and I love it.

The other day I was vacuuming the living room and I didn’t hear her come into the house, the first (quite shocking) thing I knew of it was her grabbing a handful of my hair and yanking my head back with one hand and roughly squeezing one of my tits with the other.

She bit into my neck, and I don’t mean she kissed it roughly or sucked on it, she bit me quite hard and tightened her grip on my hair and breast. I dropped the vacuum cleaner. She used my hair to push me down to the floor and then pulled her jeans and underwear down before lying down on the floor.

It was a little awkward as she pulled me by the hair, I didn’t know where she wanted me but eventually she got me in position, on all fours over her in a 69 position. She pushed my head down and I buried it in her pussy and began licking and sucking her very wet pussy.

She pulled my skimpy knickers to the side and actually ripped the thin lace in the process and pushed two fingers roughly into my pussy, which was also wet. They immediately came out though and she forced them into my ass and replaced them with her thumb in my pussy.

She fucked my pussy and ass with that hand and rubbed my clit with another whilst I licked and sucked her pussy and she had me on the edge very quickly and I had to stop licking to beg for my orgasm because I didn’t know if I could hold it but she just slapped my ass and moaned “don’t stop!” and I continued my attentions with my mouth assuming that was a no!

It’s hard to concentrate on what you’re doing when you’re that close to an orgasm but I all my willpower to focus on pleasing her and push my own teetering orgasm to the back of my mind until eventually she moan “cuummmmmm” and pinched my clit really hard. At the same time she clamped her thighs around my head and I let my orgasm go whilst still sucking her clit between my lips and trying to fight the urge to bite down.

As our orgasms died she pulled me and I basically fell down next to her and she wrapped her arms around me. We laid there not talking for a long while, half-dressed, glistening and panting until eventually she said “You stopped licking to ask to cum???”.

She dragged me up by my hair (she loves controlling me with my hair and I have to admit I love it too) and I stumbled up the stairs after her.

The cane bit hard on my ass and thighs, ten very hard strikes with no warmup other than the amazing sex downstairs. My ass was really sore afterwards and for days afterwards, I won’t be making that mistake again….probably.

So yeah, this sort of thing isn’t a rare occurrence, when Miss wants something from me she gets it immediately and without argument!